we could close the curtains, pretend like there's no world outside

For spring break one year, my family took a vacation to Sanibel Island, Florida. This is an absolutely beautiful and relatively un-commercialized vacation spot (i.e. the beaches aren't totally covered with rich, anorexic spring-breakers every year). It's pretty nice. I had been there before, and I'd go there again.

But for some reason, that one year I brought a half a suitcase full of yarn and various knitting needles, and I stayed in the beach house we were renting and knitted. Constantly. The entire week. And had a blast. I didn't bring any patterns and had no access to the internet, so I created an entire line of hats out of my head.

Looking back, my parents probably spent a good deal of money renting the place, and I probably should have spent more time out on the beach taking advantage of that... but hey. It was a nice vacation.

I think that's the kind of vacation I need to have more often. I can't remember the last time I've done that kind of thing without feeling guilty for "wasting time" or stressed afterward from pushing things like homework or errands to the absolute brink of their deadlines.

That's where I am right now. I have a presentation that needs to be basically done by this evening, and I'm still in the planning stages.

And of course, I'm suddenly full of inspiration to spin, knit, carve stamps, go thrift store shopping, bake, draw, paint, throw pots...


Fuck.

nobody said it was easy.

hi there.

missed you. I've been pretty caught up in other things lately, but there's a lot I should have written about. first - I've had quite a few days of feeling like I'm floating/dreaming/high out of my mind. in the best possible way. gotta attribute those to the adorable Coffee Master I'm currently dating. and, you know, the fact that I'm a ridiculous, irrational, optimist.

but then... my job. I get tired of hearing:
"Do you really want to be a barista for the rest of your life?"
- Yes.
"You think you can really make a living making people lattes?"
- Probably not.
"Find a job doing something you're really passionate about."
- Um, hello? Coffee?

not that any of this has ever discouraged me from being head-over-heels in love with my current job. I love the customers, the relationships with the regulars, the adrenaline during the morning rush, the ease with which you can make someone happy by memorizing their drink, the control I have over tips, the FREE COFFEE, the access to a decent espresso machine... oh god. love love love.

I also love the people I work with. but due to massive drama, we've lost two over the past month. not only do I miss them terribly, our store is now incredibly understaffed. also, the majority of our employees are in school, and during the semester I am among the only three who can work during the weekdays. so all my shifts start at either 5 am, 6 am, or 7 am. and I close Saturdays and come in at 8 on Sundays. that leaves me with a maximum of 6 potential hours of sleep, which wouldn't really be that bad, but the chances of me actually falling asleep as soon as I get home from work are slim. boo. also, I'll be working a total of 30 hours a week, plus 12 hours of school... and I think that's a lot to ask of anyone.

so I'm quitting. and it's tough. I had a few days where I felt completely unmotivated and uninspired to do anything - as if all I was actually capable of doing was working (found my inspiration, though - watch The Science of Sleep).

but... I turned in an application at Peet's, and I got a call yesterday and set up an interview for tomorrow. eek. there are things about Peet's that I'm not terribly excited about (uniform, potential slllooooww shifts, noisy grocery store right beside it) but there are other things I am excited about, like being paid what I deserve, getting the lunch breaks I'm legally entitled to, and hopefully having a more flexible schedule.

so wish me luck. I just want a job I can be happy with. that lets me play around with an espresso machine.

14.

Ahh, this is ridiculous.

I'll put it into writing so may seem like less of a massive flood of stuff to do. Or it may seem like more. Either way, organization should help?

Due Monday:

1) study for another ridiculous Abnormal Psych exam. After I took the last one, I passed out on the floor of the testing center. It's freezing in there. I don't understand why they feel like they can afford to pay to keep the air conditioning at 60 degrees, but not to pay enough staff to keep it open for reasonable hours on weekends.

Tuesday:

1) "Life Script" project for Personality Theory. Haven't started yet. This is basically an in-depth self examination from ages 3-18. And I'm serious when I say in-depth. There are questions about family, favorite TV shows, most embarrassing moments... and of course you're required to analyze how these had an effect on your life and ideologies and EVERYTHING. Counts for a HUGE part of my grade.

2) Tri-color painting for Design. I hate painting with acrylic. I'm absolutely horrible at it. And this painting is looking absolutely horrible. I'm considering trashing it and starting over, but I've already wasted 9 hours of my life on it. Grrr.

Thursday:

1) Study for a Spanish exam. This shouldn't be too big of a deal - I have skipped the majority of my classes since the last exam, but I'm not concerned. The class is a joke. The professor is a joke. But at least she's understanding and likes me so I don't lose grade points for not coming to class. I hope.

2) Film analysis for Abnormal Psych. This one could actually be fun, if I had more time to enjoy it. I almost convinced someone to do it for me today. This person seems to have developed a strong addiction to my chocolate chip cookies, and was ready to kill for another batch. Not commit plagiarism for me, though, apparently.

Then I'm going to Colombia for ten days (hope I can find some sort of internet cafe, or my NaBloPoMo dreams are screwed)...

And due the day I get back:

1) Mental Health Issues Survey for Abnormal Psych. I already have all my interviews done; now all that is left is to analyze trends and correlations, 2-3 pages. Cake.

2) Final Project in Spanish. I think this is supposed to be some some of short insrtuctional speech... I really should find out soon, I guess. Shouldn't be hard - I'm going to be working on it whilst in a Spanish-speaking country.

And then: 1) Major, million-page personality theory thesis, 2) Final project in Design, 3) Personality Theory final, 4) Abnormal Psych final, 5) Design vocab final, 6) Abnormal Psych clinical analysis video...

and I really, really, hope that's all.

08.

I find it rather unfair that a busy schedule + many responsibilities/obligations leads to high levels of stress, which in turn lower the effectiveness of your immune system which increases the likelihood of getting sick, which causes intense levels of stress and even less time to get everything done which lowers your immune system further, and so on until you're a coffee-chugging zombie just barely dragging yourself from bed, to school, to work, and back to bed again.

I mean, really.

Stress should have good side effects. It shouldn't make you fat or anorexic, make it harder for you to sleep, or increase your risk of developing heart disease and mental disorder.

There's the elusive concept of "eustress," which is supposed to enhance performance and sharpen response to the stressor... but how often does that really occur?

I guess stress kind of has to be a downward spiral so you can't rely entirely on yourself - you need other people to help you out sometimes. In that case, I'm thankful for it. And even more thankful for those people who have been there for me lately while I'm dangerously close to losing my mind out of pure exhaustion.

I'm lucky.

06.

Technically it's tomorrow.

And I know I'm not going to have time during the day.

And I'm still not at the point where I'm passing out from extreme sleep deprivation...

So here's November 6th's post.

On my mind tonight:

Some "advice" I tend get a lot from older individuals. They say, almost wistfully: "enjoy these years - this is the best time of your life."

Every time I hear that I think, what an absolutely horrible thing to say. This is it? This is the best? That's utterly ridiculous. It may be a nice time, with minimal responsibilities and lots of opportunities, but is that really what it's ultimately all about? I don't think so. Life's a journey, and it gets better every step of the way. I look forward to being "tied down," as it were, with a family, a career, etc. Not too soon, but yeah - I'll give up my freedom gladly to be able to move on to the next important step in my life. I don't want to hear that it's all going to be downhill from here. Read Erik Erikson's theory of lifespan development. He has it more or less figured out.

04.

just barely squeaking by on today's deadline... today was also quite long.

I'm feeling slightly like death, so I'm going to keep it very short, but if I can find time, I'll have plenty to write about tomorrow.

1) everyone, quit being so bitchy about politics. don't tell me who I should vote for, say I'm stupid for voting a certain way, or whine about who gets elected. this goes for both sides. grow up.

2) school is eating me alive. but there's only about a month and a half left. hallelujah.

3) I laugh at all the people who were so excited to get their free starbucks coffee today. ha. haha. ha.

if it's not too late for coffee, I'll be at your place in 10.

Oh, life. It's lovely.

But it does wear one out.

School remains hectic - I'm coming to terms with the fact that life will not end if I don't make the dean's list this semester... still going to work my ass off to try, though.

The coffee shop is quite nice. I've had three 5 am shifts this week, and though they've been more fun than the cold-molasses-y slow night shifts, they freaking kill me. I've been pretty good about getting to sleep by 11, but that still only gives me 4.5 hours of sleep. Not quite enough. I can give customers huge fake smiles and get their orders right, but when I get home I crasssssssshhh. Which is not good when one has massive amounts of homework to do.

But, again, it would be much worse if I had to deal with bitchy coworkers. And I'm finally getting tips, so that extra dollar or so an hour makes my pay almost comparable to what I was making at the Purple Crayon. And I feel like I have a bit more control over tips - chat a little bit with the customers and compliment their shirt/purse/motorcycle, and you're more likely to get a dollar or so.

But on the other hand, some people get their only social contact at the drive-thru at 6 am, and thus talk your ear off for 10 minutes and proceed to pay in exact change. :(

And some people are just flat-out rude. Srsly. I may feel like murdering everyone who talks loudly to me before I've had my morning coffee, but I can usually control that urge. Obviously there are those who cannot.

And that's about it. My life is work, school, sleep, and the occasional pre/post-work/school outing right now. And lots of delicious, free coffee. And doughnuts. Oh my. I've gained three pounds since I started working. Yayy :))


*note to Latte Boy: good-looking guys are actually a rarity in the mornings - don't be jealous. I only flirt with old, ugly guys.

take my hand, and we'll make it, I swear.

I can't remember ever being this stressed in my life.

I keep telling myself, "this is a good thing - it builds character, strengthens tolerance, teaches patience..."

Whatever. While true, whatever positive things may happen as a result in the future, none of them really help in the moment. Having no time to do anything except work, study, do homework, and freak out about how much work, studying, and homework you have to do sucks hardcore. I don't actually have time to be writing this blog, but I think it helps a little bit - maybe to pinpoint what's really bothering me, maybe just to get it out there so I'm not dealing with this alone.

Like I've mentioned before, procrastination and my tendency to be easily distracted are probably what puts me in these stressful situations, but it does seem like all my professors get together and assign everything to be due at exactly the same time. Conspiracy.

One of the things that is absolutely DRIVING ME CRAZY is how all these psych classes are turning me into a hyper-analytical self-therapist... I pretty much uncontrollably start analyzing everything I say or think while I'm thinking or saying it. It's like there are two voices in my head that are both trying to talk at the same time - unbelievably confusing. My professor warned everyone at the beginning of the semester that this might happen. Didn't tell us how to stop it, however.


So. On stress. I think right now it would be great to have some kind of cathartic, emotional release, like a fit of screaming or some frustrated tears... but instead I'm going numb, and parts of my brain are shutting off so I can't feel anything except frustration at not being able to feel anything. Ego defense mechanism? Maybe, but they're supposed to be unconscious. If anything, I'd call this intellectualization.

Can't shut my ridiculously busy brain off. I used to be able to when I was taking yoga. Now every waking moment it's going over these impossible questions and trying to find solutions. Silly brain, just accept that the only solution is to STOP THINKING and just DO the things that need to be done and not distract me so much. Grr. Inner conflict, much?

I think there's a big part of me that has trouble accepting helplessness - I'm pretty strong and independent (or so I'd like to believe), so I should be able to do anything, right? I think so. But I can't wrap my head around the fact that certain things are outside of my control.

I know other people have been here (I'm starting to wonder if this is how all the LCA Western Civvies felt during senior year) - what do you do? I really can't spare any time for relaxing things like knitting, spinning, watching movies... is there just a certain state of mind I should aim for?


Well. My lunch (which is also going to have to count as breakfast and dinner until I can eat after my 6:30-9 class) has finally sunk in so I don't feel on the verge of passing out. Back to work.

judging by your smile, you are holding something back

It's 4:15 AM.

I'm sure there are plenty of morning people, people with long commutes, polyphasic sleepers, coffee/doughnut shop workers, Walmart employees, and Good Morning America hosts who are just waking up; getting ready to start their days.

I'm still trying to get to sleep. Not really trying anymore, obviously. Briefly giving up with the hopes that sudden, uncontrollably narcolepsy will hit me while I'm typing.

I guess I could be revving up for NaBloPoMo in November. I seriously considered doing that last year, but I suspect that deep down in my psyche there's something that rebels against me forming positive habits, and subconsciously forces me to skip a day - just to weaken my resolve. And I'm just not the type of person to feel guilty about that kind of thing. Probably why I've never stuck to a diet or exercise plan for more than 2 days. Really hope my metabolism is still this fast when I'm 30.


Why am I still awake? It could be because of the massive amounts of coffee I drank today. Don't even want to start figuring out the milligrams of caffeine. But it never had any effect (affect? Mrs. Rice would know.) on me whatsoever at 10 this morning when I desperately needed it... no sleep last night either. There's this mosquito (but there must be more than one, because I caught one in midair and squashed it with a vengeance about 4 hours ago) that must be invisible and the size of a small dog that flies around my head pretty much constantly every night. It's the loudest thing I've heard in my life. And I have about 500 bites all over my body, because it somehow can bite through my comforter when it gets tired of biting my exposed arms and feet. Good Lord. I'm mystified.

But! I found a way to at least tune out the sound (even though I still know it's there and biting, and it haunts me) - brilliant iPhone app aSleep. Plays ambient sounds through your headphones to block out mosquito noises. Probably good for studying in distracting places or doing yoga, too. Best 99 pennies I ever spent.

Another possible reason for this insomnia - the weird, 4 hour nap I took today. I started out feeling like my body was probably about to give up and die after being sick for 9 days (I'll discuss that momentarily), and woke up feeling significantly more hopeful, but physically the same. Weird feeling - being happy and feeling like shit at the same time. I don't recommend it.

On being sick: it sucks. But it has been extremely interesting noticing the changes in my mental processes (psych geek =])over the course of the last 9 days (minus Thursday - I was actually feeling pretty decent then). I hopped back and forth between wanting sympathy and telling myself to suck it up sooo many times, and there was a point when I seriously wanted to exact severe physical revenge on whichever poor soul it was who came to school while sick and infected me. Sometimes I wasn't thinking at all - that's hard to do if you're trying. And then there was today, when I was tired of taking drugs and feeling slightly better for a few hours just to crash back into feeling horrible...

Tylenol PM used to be my best friend. Now, thanks to a horrific series of nightmares, I don't think I'll ever have the courage to take it again.


Buh. I should try to sleep again. I have a paper to write tomorrow, and possibly a doctor's appointment. And a babysitting job I'm going to cancel.

But you can't deny that this was a beautiful glimpse at the kind of things that run around in my head when I don't direct my thoughts in one way or another. And that was the censored version.

It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life... and I'm feelin good.

You guys were so right.

Blocking the hell out of that mitten made it absolutely beautiful. I should never have doubted one of the most basic of the ancient rites of Needlecraftery. I'm sorry. And I definitely haven't taken an after picture, nor have I photo'd the other projects I've been working on. Just trust me - they're all incredible, as usual.


Speaking of incredible.

My many hours spent choosing professors and organizing my schedule have not left me disappointed. Though not actually incredible, thanks to various unrelated, outside factors, my classes have been very promising so far.

Psych of Personality/Abnormal Psych - THANK YOU, RateMyProfessors.com. I took a big risk taking the same guy for two classes, but I'm not sorry. He's so laid-back and casual, but at the same time has a deep sense of professionalism and serious control of the classroom. Annnd he knows my name and looks deep into my eyes - almost into my soul - when I'm talking...

ahem.

And of course there's the obligatory bitch who insists on letting everyone know exactly how disgusting she thinks people with tattoos and piercings are and "lyke, omg, they're so nasty, I don't even knooooowww how anyone could dooo anything like that to their bodies and they must be totally messed up and psychotic to put poison in their bloodstream and mutilate themselves and ZZOOOMG! girl next to me, is that a nose ring??? omigod, what were you thinking, do you really just hate your body that much that you would mistreat it like that??"

On a good day, I want to strangle her. On a day like today, I had to flip her off with both hands under the desk. Hon, we all have our own opinions, and a debate (though on a completely unrelated subject) is actually a great and appropriate time to voice them, but if you happen to be blonde and stupid and have a abnormally squeaky voice, don't sit next to someone with a fever and massive sinus congestion and expect to live.

But, lo; the wonderful Professor L. is quick to get the discussion back on track without offending anyone or allowing any violent fights to break out. Yayy :)


Intermediate Spanish I - interesting class, with a good number of what I presume are "continuing education" students, ages 40-75, and kids who took Beginning Spanish II from the same prof. last semester. La Maestra is rather eccentric, consistently 10-15 minutes late, and tends to mostly call on her pet students from previous classes (I suspect it's because theirs are the only names she can remember). Normally, all these things would seriously annoy me in a professor, but for some reason I don't mind them coming from her. Maybe it's because she's hilarious. Or maybe it's because the only time she did call on me, she gave me a huge ego-boosting complement on my accent.


2-D Design - Ahh. This class awakens the long-dormant artist inside my soul. The first time I walked into the room I gave a huge, involuntary sigh and got a beautiful feeling of everything being right with the world. Artgasam.

The lighting is amazing, the ceilings are high, the tables are rotating, the chairs are comfy - in short, the room alone is the polar opposite of the prison-like image I usually associate with school and academia. The instructor is shockingly young, and probably in her first or second year of teaching. She's only given one lecture so far, so I can't form much of an opinion on how qualified she is, but at least her slight drawl (which normally realllly irratates me - a side effect of growing up with some hardcore rednecks in rural Alabama, I guess?) is more endearning than annoying.

Most importantly, it's giving me some time to actually sit down and create something. I'll be honest - spending two and a half hours in the same class is rather tough, but I've only had to actually stay the whole duration once. I had already finished my project when I came to class today, so I just drew penguins and owls for about an hour, until Teach came over to look at my progress and told me I could go if I was quiet and didn't let anyone see me leave :)


So my education is progressing quite nicely, and I usually get to see a friendly face in or on the way to every class. It's pretty wonderful. Not seeing a whole lot of opportunity for in-class knitting, but I may be able to work something out with my Psych professor.

@#)%#$#! Cables.

I'm working on Chevalier Mittens, and it could just be a random bout of perfectionism, but I feel like my cables are looking like craaaaap. I had always heard cabling without a cable needle made them neater - less stretching of the stitches - but I think it may actually look worse than when I use one.

I'm knitting with Paton's Classic Merino and size 6 dpns - wrong gauge, maybe?

I'll take before and after blocking pictures to see if that helps any.


Also. I'm super excited about Twist Collective. A gazillion of my favorite designers have patterns on (in?) it, and I'm probably going to spend every dollar I have buying them and their yarns.

Annd that's all I have time for.

Taking Care of Business

Work has been pretty crazy lately. My boss is pretty disorganized (I sympathize - we're artists, not accountants), and occasionally I end up having to pay the price for her lack of foresight. I've become used to having the project I'm going to teach explained to me at the literal last minute, but this week I had to make it up as I went along with two classes - one of which had twelve 6-10 year-olds. And of course, only half the class arrives on time, so I'm constantly jumping back and forth between steps to help the latecomers catch up. Also, during the summer, there are always kids going out of town who want to know when they can do a make-up class. That was so much easier to deal with when we had our own place - people could come in pretty much any time we were open - but now we have to find a class in the next session for them to come to. And these sorts of inquiries are always made in the middle of class, with dozens of noisy kids all asking for help making various parts of a clay monkey pencil holder that I'm making up on the spot. Utter Chaos.

Now my boss is going out of town for three weeks, leaving me to basically run the business. I am, in fact, freaking out slightly. But maybe now that I have all the projects ahead of time I'll be able to divert some disasters (like leaving all our glazes at the other facility when all the entire class had left to do was paint their clay pieces. that was a fun day). My entire schedule has changed - thank God for iCal or I'd never show up at the right place at the right time. I'm also going to have to start dressing a little more professionally so parents will take me seriously. Last week someone asked me what my "qualifications" were, and I was a little taken aback. Am I qualified? I finally decided to call myself an art student, even though I'm majoring in Spanish/Psych/Chem and haven't taken any college art classes to speak of yet. Makes me sound legit.


I've been knitting a little bit, but there are so many things I want to make, that I end up starting a million projects at once and never finishing any. I'm almost done with Hello Yarn's top down bonnet (figure-8 cast on is freaking brilliant), but I probably made it far to small to fit any normal baby. Damn gauge.

I did flickr (yes, that's a verb) some pictures of thank you cards I made for people who sent me especially large graduation checks - here's one of my favorites:



Uniball ink pens = love.

Apathetic = Pathetic

I guess I'm a hippie at heart.

I secretly wish everyone would just get along with everyone else, and that we could have peace, love, legalized drugs... all that fun stuff.

But I'm also a realist. I know enough about the nature of man and of the world to accept that perfection is unattainable. It seems like humans are driven by one thing: power (money, fame, good looks, popularity - they're all different ways of obtaining it). And power, as we all have learned from every comic book villain in existence, leads to corruption.

"Oh, I want to build this ginormous laser to help people, to save lives..."

Sure, and get filthy rich and have sole control over the world's supply of potable water/oil/electricity/whatever...

I'm not interested in politics. Frankly, (and my apologies to any government worker who happens to have me on their blogroll) I think politics is a dirty, repulsive, backstabbing business, and can't imagine why people seem so eager to get involved in it.

I took PolySci. I hated it. But I did learn a few things (with little thanks to my professor or textbook).

Firstly, apathy is your worst enemy. Yeah, there's a chance your vote won't count for anything, let's be honest. If you're voting democratic in a solidly red state, you're not going to change the color, or even make purple. And independents? It almost seems like they're wasting their time (next post's rant: give proportional representation a chance!). But who knows what could happen if everyone who didn't vote because they thought their vote wouldn't count for anything decided to go to the polls?

According to the first legitimate-looking website I could find on Google, eligible voter turnout in 2004's November election was FIFTY-FREAKING-FIVE PERCENT. This number simultaneously scares, saddens, and astonishes me. Almost half of our eligible US population, for whatever reason, decided not to vote on who should run the country for the next four years. I can't understand it.

Government should be run by the people, for the people. Not by 55% of the people for 55% of the people. There are plenty of countries that have never been given the chance to have any input about who governs. There are also countries where the people are forced to vote, and there may only be one name on the ballot, or they know someone will come hurt them and their family if they vote the "wrong way". In the USA we have the right to vote - and we also have the right not to vote.

So no matter what your opinion (I really don't care - as long as you have one, and you don't try to shove it down my throat without politely listening to my point of view), if you don't act on it, it's worth absolutely nothing. Whether acting on it means voting (yay!), educating others about it (ahem, radical pro-lifers, how bout some sex-ed [abstinence-only doesn't count] instead of bombing abortion clinics?), or just living it (practice what you preach, actions speak louder than words, etc.), even if I blatantly disagree with you, I'll respect what you're doing.


I apologize for this brief digression from yarn, knitting, and other more knit-blog friendly subjects (i.e. pets and children... whew. if I have to read one more post about what someone's cat has to say about a certain brand of yarn, I'm going to lose my mind.), but I had to get it out there.

You Spin Me Right Round, Baby, Right Round Like a Record

Hello, Blog.

I dropped (or am in the process of dropping - I just skipped today) my Art History class, so I finally have a little free time and can sleep in on M/W/F until 9. This has increased my quality of life by like 96%.

I really thought I would enjoy Art History; that it'd be a fun, blow-off class for my blow-off senior year. But no. Looking at the syllabus, it'd be more work than Anatomy. Besides that, I'm not really into spending 15 minutes of class doing "art news," which seems to me to be the college equivalent of the dreaded current events reports I had to do for a whole year in 9th grade Social Studies.

Plus, the professor is partially deaf, repeats everything you say twice, and acts like she's scared to death of all her students. Not how I think an art teacher should be.

So as soon as I hear back from an adviser, I'm out of there. I'm keeping the book, though. I'll probably take the class again when my boss's friend starts teaching it at my campus.


So... fiberwise.

I'm spinning! It's pretty much the coolest thing I've ever done in my entire life. My darling mother found the wonderful Miss Cindy in our city's little directory, living less than 10 minutes away, and we went over to her house before Christmas to see her sheep and alpacas.



Annnd we signed ourselves up for spinning lessons immediately. Two lessons later, and I've gotten pretty comfortable with both the drop spindle and the wheel. I think we'll be plying next lesson. Yarn pictures to come!


Weather has been rather freezing lately, so I've been pretty prolific in my knitting.

First, the rather disappointing Headline News.



I used Wool Ease, just because I had it on hand, but I think it was a mistake. With the huge needles the pattern calls for, it makes a really holey fabric that's kind of disgusting after knitting worsted weight socks on size 2 needles.


Next, a commissioned (yay!) space invaders beanie for my friend Josiah. Inspired, of course, by my amazing space invaders tea cozy.



This uses black Simply Soft, and - get this - GLOW IN THE DARK NYLON. I know. It blows my mind. I've been trying really hard to get a glowing picture of it, but I think I'm going to need a tripod and a really long exposure camera. It's not the softest, and it's splitty as hell, but HELLO. It glows in the freaking dark. Unfortunately, my fair isle is not quite up to par yet, and I didn't make it stretchy enough to fit its intended owner. So I'm knitting another one!


Next, a little something I call Roxy Hart, because it reminds me of the kind of cloche Renee Zellweger wore in Chicago.



This was basically me practicing granny squares (my first!), and when I found myself with an alarming amount of them, I slip stitched em together and picked up stitches around the top to make a hat!


I've got a few other projects to post later, but this post has already sucked up an hour of my morning languidity (not a real word?), they'll have to wait while do more important things. Like play Guitar Hero III.

Smile Like You Mean It

Things that made me smile this week:

1) At work, suddenly hearing an adorable 3-year old's loud rendition of "Happy Birthday to You" coming from the bathroom. Apparently my boss told her that to make sure your hands are really clean, one must wash them for as long as it takes to sing Happy Birthday. Holy freaking crap, that's cute.

2) Watching the dog set off mouse traps with his tail. Hehehe.

Things that did not make me smile:

1) Finishing my book for government and realizing I had no recollection of what I had just read. Oops.

2) Wearing 3" heels. Fell and twisted my foot and got a lovely bruise on my rear.

3) Re-knitting Greenery and slowly having to come to terms with the fact that I was knitting a ranch house in Argentina, and not a hat. Is there no happy medium between tiny and gargantuan?


I have been doing my part in spreading the knitting gospel. I encouraged Gibby to become re-obsessed with yarn, and she has turned out a couple hats already this month, and got one of her friends started on a scarf. I also re-taught one of my fellow librarians the garter stitch, and hopefully piqued the interest of another, who promised to bring yarn and needles next week. Even the boy asked to try a stitch or two, but as I was knitting a ridiculously tight-gauged sock in black fuzzy alpaca at the time, I told him to wait until I had something easier for him to practice on. I really regret missing that golden opportunity, but hopefully he'll be interested again later.

Oh, almost neglected the most surprising of new converts. My darling father, in an effort to give one of his coworkers something to do with his hands besides noisily smush his water bottle, asked if I could teach him the basics so he could teach his friend in turn. Too good to be true.

Men are strange animals. Whenever you ask them if they'd like to learn to knit, they either make some comment about how it's girly (the stupid ones), or say something like "I have you to knit me anything I could want" (the smart ones [i.e. Darien]). But recent developments have shown that despite their protestations, the act of pulling yarn through loops to make a fabric is absolutely fascinating to them. And luckily for them, watching guys knit is absolutely fascinating (and, good God, man, sexy) to women. Better than a dog any day.

Wake Me Up When November Ends

Thank God I wasn't trying to participate in NaPoBloMo
(or whatever the abbreviation is), because I would have failed miserably. This is due mainly to the copious amounts of homework/college prep/work I've been trying to cram into my days lately. That and knitting.

Remember how I was annoyed that Darien put everything off until the last minute? Pot, kettle, black. This book review for PolySci was assigned almost at the beginning of the semester, and I'm still only about halfway through my book. Oh, and it's due Monday. So clearly I have a lot of long hours of boring reading to do before it gets too late to start writing. If only I could get it as an ebook. As it is, I think I'll probably end up just skimming and BS-ing.


Today marks my one-week anniversary on Ravelry! Yay! I've been so inspired by all the patterns on there, I have about five million projects going at the same time. And I just blew my latest paycheck on Knit Picks. But it's for a worthy cause. I'm making Katamari Damacy earmuffs, among other things. And then I had to buy a few more skeins because, hello, free shipping on orders over $45.

I'd love to post some pictures of what I've been working on, but I can't on the off chance that one of my gift recipients stumbles upon this blog and finds out what they're getting for Christmas. So check me out on Ravelry - I'm blissfulolivian.

I Don't Mind You Coming Here and Wasting All My Time

I just found out that one specific person (who I now realize I spend the majority of my unoccupied hours with) will be insanely busy with exams and research papers for the next two+ weeks, and won't be able to hang out. So I suddenly find my self with tons (from an LCA student's perspective) of free time. And perhaps an ounce of bitterness towards said person for putting all this off until now.

So the only way for me to hold on to my sanity and not lapse into a zombie-like state until Christmas break is to totally cram every spare moment with positive, productive, activities. And to motivate myself, further, I'm publishing my list of ideas so I can be held accountable in some ambiguous way. Here goes.

1) CLEAN/ORGANIZE
Damn it. I really really really don't want to. But it's kind of getting to the point where I can't set foot in my room without stepping on something weird and random (example from today: a little garter snake brought inside by Rio. Lovely). And I prefer knowing exactly what I'm going to be stepping on, if stepping on anything is even necessary. Plus, I'm probably only wearing a third of the wearable clothes I own. The rest are buried under piles of... stuff.

2) SPEND TIME WITH OTHER PEOPLE
I really wish I didn't have to put this on the list, but sadly, a lot of my good friends have kind of fallen by the wayside lately with all the homework/work-free time I have occupied by this one kid. And worse still, I've been purposefully avoiding one or two of my friends because of arguments that I don't have the energy to work through. Ugh. Still don't really have the willpower. I need to stop pretending it will go away on its own.

3) WATCH IMDB 250 MOVIES
Quad C's library is chock full of them, so I no longer have to dominate the Blockbuster queue and force my family to watch my weird indie movies. I do need to remember to take them back in time though. You can only have three out at a time for 2 days, and the late fee is $1 a day. Needless to say, I've already made a sizable donation to Quad C's new book fund. But still, it beats Blockbuster prices.

4) KNIT PROFUSELY
Um, duh. This one is combined very smoothly with #3, as long as I avoid mixing complicated patterns and foreign language films. Oh, and silent films. While wonderfully kitsch and charming, they are a bitch to knit to. Currently in the works (including projects I plan on making soon but haven't actually started): Pin-up Sweater from S'nB, Kittyville hat (with Hello Kitty modifications), way too many socks, and some yet-to-be-designed fingerless gloves.

5) BE ARTISTIC
I haven't touched my drawing pencils or paints in months. Shame on me. I'm a freaking art teacher at an art studio.

6) READ. ESPECIALLY SPYCATCHER.
I definitely need to stay faithful to my little Librivox, several-books-a-months venture. Also goes well with #4. So satisfying to be able to read (or have read to me, the idea is the same) snobby classic books and knit a sweater simultaneously. It makes the little over-achiever in me very smug. Oh, and the deadline for my horribly-boring, non-audio-book review is rapidly approaching, and I've read less than half of it.

7) EXERCISE
Yeah, I'm not sure if I'll ever get around to this one. Maybe a bit of yoga now and then. With a heavy focus on the meditation aspect.